Waiting on Death

Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; for You are with me. —Psalm 23:4 Darkness upon darkness. Sorrow upon sorrow. Pain upon pain. Anguish upon anguish. That's death. Death is a fearful visitor, snatching away loved ones who are precious to us and leaving us behind to mourn, grieve, and wonder. It blocks the light that before had shined so freely and easily on our lives. Whether we're facing the prospect of dying, or dealing with the death of a loved one, death can be devastating. It can sap our energy, change our plans, overwhelm our soul, alter our outlook, test our faith, steal our joy, and challenge our assumptions about life's purposes. When we walk through the deep valley, we feel swallowed up by the shadow and come face-to-face with fear. The frantic emptiness of our loss threatens the comfort that previously originated from our trust in God, and so we grow afraid. Afraid of our future. Afraid to enjoy life again. Yet in that valley, under that shadow, we can say to the Lord, "I will fear no evil; for You are with me" (Psalm 23:4). His loving arms never let us go. He is always with us. Slowly at first, but most assuredly, He provides comfort and release from the darkness. He gives light. He leads us out. Eventually, we escape the valley of the shadow.

Seasons

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven." Ecclesiastes 3:1 You would think the phrase "spending time with God" would bring a great anticipatory feeling of pleasure. Yet many of us respond to those words with a groan. We get caught up in wondering if we know how to do it right or if we are spending the right amount of time with God. When we were baby Christians or going through a crisis we wanted to spend every moment with Him, but maybe now that desire is not as strong. I think it helps to remember that just as God ordained seasons in nature, He ordains seasons in our lives. Those seasons play a role in our devotional time with Him. As a young woman, I recall being taught to have a quiet time that consisted of reading Scripture, praying, and writing a few words in a journal about what I was thinking. That model worked very well as I was first beginning to study God's word and to have regular conversations with Him. Later, I felt I needed more time with my Savior and committed to spending at least two hours each day in prayer and study. Then came a season filled with a demanding job, graduate school, and other activities. My time with God frequently consisted of me staring at the wall saying "Help". God seemed to always understand and to say, "That's OK, just sing to Me." So I did. In my current season I most enjoy sitting outside under the stars, at rest, knowing God is there with me. Here is the point: Spending time with your God is not about "doing", it's about "being." Being a child with your loving Father. Being a sinner with your gracious Redeemer. Being a weeping weakling with the Lifter of your head. Just being with God and enjoying the pleasure of His company while He enjoys the pleasure of yours, whatever season you are in.

Women's Ministry

VERSE: Be careful not to do your "acts of righteousness" before men, to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven. -- Matthew 6:1

Why do we do the things we do? What is the motivation for our behavior? It's so easy to fall into the trap of doing religious things so we will look good to others. This is true even when culture reacts negatively to our faith. Those around us who know about our faith and the Christians around us become the target of our behavior. While we do want to have the right kind of influence on everyone around us, we must never make our decisions about spiritual service on the basis of being seen by others to be honored because of it. Our goal must be to honor God and bless others!

MY PRAYER: Almighty God, please purify my heart of any false motivation and help me serve others based on their need and my desire to honor you in helping them.

In Jesus' name I pray. Amen.

Quote

It is through dying to concern for self that we are born to new life with God and others; in such dying and rebirth, we find that life is lent to be spent; and in such spending of what we are lent, we find there is an infinite supply. -- Glenn Olds

Listen

He does not believe, that does not live according to his belief. -- Thomas Fuller

I've told you before that I don't believe in "signs" from God. I mean, if I'm driving down the road and my car dies on Florida Ave. I don't take that to mean I should move to Florida. For the most part, I believe God speaks to me through His word. The Holy Spirit may prompt me to read special passages that draw me to conclusions, but I don't typically hear voices or see visions.

However, today I was walking through Target hunting for a bookcase, to put all my Christian Education material into, when I see this framed quote. It says:

"Take time for the quiet moments for God whispers and the world is loud."

I look all around and it is the only one I see. I pick it up and put it in my basket. It hit a place in my core and I knew I wanted to read that phrase every day. Then I tootle around the store to find my bookcase and I see more pictures like the quote I found. I go over to the display and there are several of each saying. I notice two things. First, none of the other sayings mention God or reflect on His word. Second, there aren't any like the one I had previously found. Hummm...it was like it had been put there just for me to find.

I get home and wrestle my new bookcase into the house. I crash on the couch for a moment and turn on XM radio and what did I hear, but Amy Grant telling me to "Take a little time" ... because it takes time to "turn the titanic around". WHAT? OK, what you don't know is that someone else had once compared my church to the titanic when talking about some of the issues there.

Listen, be still, and wait upon the Lord. Could it be a sign?

"I wait for you, O LORD; you will answer, O Lord my God. " Psalm 38:15

Song

http://www.applauseav.com/files/Not_the_Least_of_Whom_is_Me.mp3

This is a great song that a friend sent me. Listen to the words ... it is my heart for you.

Making Plans

I received a call today from a friend. His step-father is dieing and he is headed home for the funeral. His step-father has lived a full life and his immanent death didn't come as a surprise. Since they don't know how much longer he will live my friend will plan to be there for several days.

Nobody likes to think about death. We especially don't like to think about our own death. It's a little scary that we do not know the day or hour it will happen. We might go to sleep some evening never to wake up. We might be driving down the road and a car hits us with no warning. Anything could happen at any time so people need to prepare. I know I have a will made out and even have outlined what I would like for a funeral service.

There is something else to consider too. Christ's return. I don't know the day or hour it will happen. In the blinking of an eye Christ will come for His bride and we will be gone.

I'm preparing for that day too. First, I have accepted Christ as my Savior. I know I am a sinful creature and without His atoning blood I would spend eternity in hell. I also know that on that day, I see Him face to face, I do not want to show up empty handed. When I lay my crown before Him I want it filled with many jewels to give Glory to the Lord.

I don't know if death will take my life before the Lord arrives, but either way, I know I am prepared.

Have you been making plans?

Just Friends?

My friend Cathy is in love, unfortunately, I don't think the feeling is returned by John. In most relationships one person loves more than the other, but they are both in love. In this case I think John cares about Cathy, he may even love her, but he is not in love with her. He enjoys her company and they do activities together, but when it comes down to it ... John will eventually walk away for his true love.

As I was watching John this morning, sitting with another women, it made me think about my relationship with Jesus. Do I really love Him or do I just enjoy His company at times? At the end of my day will I walk off with the other things in my life? Which do I love more - Jesus or the things of this world like popularity, sensual pleasures, and wealth? Am I in love with the Lord or are we just friends?

How about you?

Strength

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.
-- Isaiah 40:29

Just Visiting

I know I said I was taking a break but I just had to tell you about this morning.

Prayer at City Hall was amazing today. There were only 8 of us but it was the power prayers there - like it was planned or something. We lifted the concerns of the city to our Father and I know He will not only hear, He will provide.

I also had 2 people tell me, independent of each other, that "God is going to use you in a great way." Seems odd that they would both say it this morning. I know God uses everyone, and in whatever fashion that is, it greatly helps the kingdom. But, I think they are talking about something different.

I have been given the next 5 months for some reason. Rest and time to reflect are high on my agenda for them. Perhaps this is the time I more clearly see where all this is heading. Pray for clarity.

It was a beautiful day in the Lord. Praise Him in all things great and small.

Bye

I will not be posting here for a while.

A series of events has left me a little numb. Disillusioned? I don't think it is so much that as being disheartened. The church world isn't much better than the secular world. Don't know why that came as a surprise. Both worlds are made of imperfect humans.

I will work hard to complete the class I am taking in a manner worthy of my instructors time and efforts. But after that, I am taking a break. I have not lost my faith in God,I only lost faith in my religion.

It's the age old question women have always asked ... why would God give me these skills and spiritual gifts if He did not want me to use them? I am sure He does, so I just need to let Him show me how and where and when.

I'll be back.

Quote

"In life, both faith and fear will arise within you and
you choose which one will prevail." - John Maxwell

"Two natures beat within my breast,
The one is foul, the other blessed.
The one I love, the other I hate;
The one I feed will dominate."

Qualified

"God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called."

Crazy Week

It has been a crazy week and it's only Tuesday! Monday was a tough day to get through. Started out with some discouraging news from my church. As I was dwelling on that I had a few problems in the office. School is an ongoing issue. I love what I am learning right now, but it is so much work it's difficult some days to get it all done. Then there was the problem with the chamber. I don't often play the "because I can" card but I felt it was necessary yesterday. I was so depressed by the time I got home I just wandered around the house for a while and then went to bed around 10:30 - early for me.

I woke up around 3:00 this morning in distress. I stretched my arms out and prayed more sincerely than I have in a long while. Around 4:00 I got out of bed, dressed myself, and went to work. I was trusting the Lord for help to get through the day; knowing trials are just as much a part of the Christian walk as the easy days. I wasn't sure which I was going to receive.

I decided I would go ahead and register for the fall semester at DBU. I had decided to only take one class for several reasons...however it had been cancelled! I called my advisor to confirm the Internet information and she said I would need to select another course. She sent me information on two other classes. My hope for the day was beginning to fade.

I said another prayer. "I can't do this, help me."

Then a hearing aid rep shows up thinking we had an appointment - we didn't. But I needed some supplies from her company that I had ordered but not received. She made a couple of calls and the supplies will be in my office tomorrow - free of charge. Free is good right now. Then the phone rings. A woman I have never met wanted to thank me for starting the prayers at City Hall each week. She had read about it in the paper last May but was just now getting around to calling. She plans to join us in the morning - and she will bring her pastor with her. Now, the desire of my heart is to minister to the pastors in town. Do you think God knew that?

Remember me telling you there was an issue with the chamber? Well, the man I had been reprimanding yesterday sent me an email that just said, "I still love you, see you at the meeting." Made going into that meeting today a lot easier.

Now about school. No great spiritual inspiration here except I think I have come to a decision. I looked over all the information for the classes available and I do not think I should take any of them. That's right, I think I will sit this semester out. But I will not be wasting that time.

What I feel I need to do is refocus and to remember what started me on this path. I need to get some discipline back into my life - both physical and spiritual. I have a lot of rebuilding to do over the next few months. Keep me in your prayers.

Then this evening I had a meeting with my Bible Study teacher and another couple from class. I was "administrating" and planning kingdom growth. We are developing ways to help others grow in their walk with the Lord. I realized I was exactly where I was supposed to be - doing what I am supposed to be doing.

If you listen for the Lord He will guide your steps.

God meets me everywhere, or I never meet Him. If I think I meet Him only in Bible and Sacrament, and in the Christian fellowship, then I do not know who it is I meet.
-- M. A. C. Warren